Nicknames

It's after 1am and I can't sleep. Why can't I sleep? Because my brain never shuts the fuck off. Tonight, instead of sleeping, it was thinking about how I have to give everyone a nickname so that when I describe that person to my roommate or my mom or someone who hasn't met most of these people...he/she knows who I'm talking about.

So then my brain started going through the list of all the nicknames I've given friends and I thought I would type it out. Oh, it won't help me sleep. No, no, silly. But at least my brain will be tired of this subject and move on to something else.

I'm tired of typing the phrase "my brain" so I think I shall give it a name.....how about....Robin Williams? Just for now until I think of something better. Or, Coked-Up Robin Williams? That's it. I shall call my brain Coked-Up Robin Williams. Think of how annoying that guy was in his hay day...and that's what my brain is like.

Luckily, no one I might have a shot with romantically will read this blog post because me suspects I just killed it right there. Having my name mentally attached to the image of a coked-up Robin Williams = no love for me.

That hairy back...[shudder]

Anyway...the fact that it is indeed after 1am will serve as my excuse for why anyone may have been left off the list. And none of these nicknames are meant to perfectly describe anyone. They're a means to an end. I say the name...the listener of my story now knows who I'm talking about...sound speed...aaaaaaaand ACTION.

Roommate From LA Sarah
My 2 Good Girl Friends From LA Remi & Carrie
Little Sister in Florida Kathryn
Girl I Stayed With in Brooklyn Amy
Asshole Ex-Boyfriend Dave
Toronto Joe
Adria the Model
My Friend That's Getting Married Leigh
Hot Actor Boy Jeffrey
My Old Boss Paul
Yoga Dan
Crazy Editor Girl Daley
Old Work Buddy Ramin
Bad Actor Guy I Lived With in LA Bruno
Lori Who Married Eric and Who Had That Wedding in Atlanta
Bob The Guy Who's Apartment I Always Stayed in When I Visited NY
Rich Cousin Randy
Guy I Had a Date with When I Went Home Over July 4th Chase
The Girl Managing the Blog With Me Alex
Bitter Guy at Work Gabe
My Boss in LA Roy
Navy Pilot Brett
Jake Who Hung Out With Julio and All of Us in High School
That Guy Who Owns Every Website Known To Man Mr. Diller
The Jenn That's Living in Atlanta but I Knew Her From UGA and LA
The Jenn That's Sometimes a Lesbian and Sometimes Not
My Friend Jessica Who I Know Through Leigh and White Water
My New Friend Jeannie
My New Friend Jeannine Not the Jeannie Girl but the Other One

Since I'm on the subject of nicknames I feel I must type out the list of the people from my LA Crew. I spent a LOT of my time with these guys and they have the BEST nicknames:

Chip
Skids
Charlie
Fuf (pronounced "foof")
D-Gus
RV
Clancy
Cam
Poisonella
Halloran
Ham
Ham (yes, there were two)
Tsubo
Probst
Kersey
Ayshe (pronounced "eye-shuh")
Mav
Chad & Macrae

That's it. It's 1:38am. Buh-byeeeezzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz... WAIT! I forgot...oh, fuck it.