Toronto Joe

I'm having the best time in Toronto.

The job is insannnnnely busy. Ridiculous actually. It's completely unorganized and really tense on set at times, etc. We fired our lead actor guy after 2 days because he just wasn't cutting it. This put us behind schedule-wise and things have been a nightmare of unorganization - chaos, really - ever since. We can't seem to catch up. But we'll make it through.

Last weekend I went out with our two actors and some of their friends and had a great time. Good food, good conversation, etc.

And I met a boy. Get ready for a long story. He's 27 and this artist, actor, writer, director, producer guy. His name is Joseph and he's amazing. From Day One on set I could tell he was looking at me and he was one of the few people on set that I never got around to officially introducing myself to. We had only exchanged a few "hi/bye's" and then one day he walked right up to me and said, "Has anyone ever told you you look like Diane Lane?" I hadn't showered and had a baseball hat on. I was like, seriously? But as cheesy/sweet as the line was - it was the way he looked at me when he said it that began the intrigue.

From then on we would chat a little here or there on set and that was it. Then last Saturday night I'm out with the actors and some of their friends and I hear that he's going to meet us out. So he does and I ditch the group I was with and went with he and his brother and cousin to another bar.

So Joseph has been drinking and tells me that he has a huge crush on me, he thinks I'm amazing, blah, blah...goes on and on. And it's really intense since he's an artist. He just made a short film and he said I was blowing his mind and he thinks part of him made the movie for me...on and on. I have never been more flattered in my life. Typing this out and re-reading it - I can see how it would look like, "Oh come on...." but it's the honesty with which he reveals these thoughts that makes me trust it.

So that night he came back to my place and we made out. He spent the night. At this point I was thinking, "Eh...he's fun to play with while I'm in Toronto, but I'm not going to get that into him."

So I show up for work this past Monday and it's a little awkward on set...then Tuesday's not as bad...then by Friday we're finding as much time as possible to sit next to each other so we can talk. He's really grown on me. We have so much in common and he's so fun to be around. He has a great laugh and thinks I'm hysterical which is always nice :) He asked me out for Saturday - Mets vs. Blue Jays game.

Backup to Friday - we were getting a ride home from our location in the Line Producer's truck. There wasn't enough room for Joseph in the truck so he was sitting in the bed of the truck in the back. So I hopped in there with him and it was so much fun. We were talking about how random life can be. One minute I'm in LA...the next I'm lying down in the back of a truck with Toronto Joe engulfed in amazing conversation.

We thought we were getting a ride home but then the truck stopped at this bar/restaurant. So we hop out of the truck and look like total rednecks to the hip Toronto-ites smoking outside. Awesome. I love that shit.

He sat next to me and we'd be in mid-conversation and then just stop and laugh and stare at each other because we can't believe how well we get along. Then he said, "You make me feel so special." I've never hung out with a guy so unafraid of saying exactly what he's thinking. It's so goddamn refreshing and freeing.

So we proceeded to get drunk. We ran into the editor of his short film - which I watched and it's absolutely beautiful. He's really talented. Which makes him all the more sexy. So we hang out with the editor and then he says that he wrote a poem for me. I'm thinking, "this guy is too much." And he was all drunk and embarrassed and wanted me to read it and then said, "no, no, I can't let you - it's not finished yet." He finally decided to let me read the first part and it was really good. He makes ME feel so special.

He came back to my place again and spent the night. We stayed in bed until the early afternoon. He left to shower and came back to take me to the Mets game. After that we went up to the top of the CN Tower which is the tallest free standing structure in the world. So we go up there and get a drink and watch the sunset. With another person it would've been cheesy but it isn't with him for some reason. On the way down in the elevator full of people we stood in the middle and faced each other. We stood as close as possible without touching. Our cheeks were side by side and we stayed in that position and didn't say a word the whole ride down. Just stood in silence and immersed ourselves in the tangible chemistry. When the elevator door opened I felt ourselves physically have to separate to exit. He looked at me and said, "Good times."

Then we went to get dinner...then went to another place to get wine & cheese. He knows a lot about wine and fine dining (LOVE that!)...then we went to a dance club that was horrible but we were laughing about how horrible it was. Then he came back to my place again and spent the night. We never run out of things to talk about, laugh about and even if there's some silence it's comfortable.

So - this whole long story - and the twist is he has a girlfriend. But he's been really honest with me from the beginning and said that he lives with her, they've been going out for a couple of years, but it's essentially over. He sunk all of his money into this short film so he can't afford to move out. He's stuck. He can't move in with his parents because they're about 1 1/2 hours outside the city and he needs to be in the city for film connections. He can't shack up with friends because most of them are living with someone or have a baby on the way, etc.

I've never been with someone knowing they have a girlfriend, but I don't care. I'm just going with it. It's so rare to find a connection and I'm not going to NOT hang out with him. Especially since he said it's over between them - it sounds like he's the real life mirror image of the movie "The Break Up". Plus, I have to think of this as an affair since we don't live in the same city.

It's going to be interesting going forward with him. He's someone that I already know I want in my life for as long as I'm alive. I want to travel with him. I miss him when I'm not around him. I worry that I'll get too attached to him - and the artist intensity - and it'll be difficult to say goodbye to him when I leave Toronto, but I'm going to worry about that later. I wouldn't miss out on a minute of being able to hang out with him because of a little heartache down the road. I feel so lucky to have him in my life. And it's amazing to be able to tell him that to his face without fear of rejection, humiliation...

Besides Joe.... Toronto is a wonderful city. It's one of the most international cities in the world yet everyone gets along so well. The people are all so friendly. You get the city/NY feel without the claustrophobia. You can drink the water from the tap. There are so many trees. The streets are clean. I'm really enjoying it.

The apartment they have me in is so sweet. I'm on the top floor (20th) of this building so I have a cool city view. And weekly maid service which helps.

My mom and dad are coming up here for Canada Day weekend (same as July 4th weekend). I'm so excited! After this is over I'm probably going to Atlanta for a week to hang out with them and then...? I have no idea. We'll see. This Toronto show could hit and become a regular 1/2 hour somewhere. Whatever. I'm really not thinking about it at all. There's no time since we're so busy - so that's a good thing. Will deal when the time comes.

Exciting changes ahead...