Chinese Cable

Has anyone out there ever tried to set up their cable with a Chinese woman?

No?

Good. Don't.

Oh My GOD - it's painful. Especially because I've never had to set up broadband cable/internet/fax/phone lines before. I've always moved into people's apartments and it's already been set up. So I'm clueless.

Then I get on the phone with this woman in Hong Kong and they of course do things differently here. And her English was shitty. So I'm trying to figure out what the hell she's talking about. There are installation fees, contracts, non-commitment contracts, 8MB of some thing, free HBO (I understood THAT), something called Netvigator, something called PCCW Wi-Fi, etc.

I kept trying to tell her I wanted cable TV and she kept saying, "No...we NOW Cable." I was like, "What the FUCK are you talking about?" I finally ascertained that their company is called NOW TV and you have to call it "NOW TV" because their competitor is iCable. So if you say you want cable they think you want the other company's services.

Fuckin' A! I've been stressed with the move of course and this was the straw that broke the back. I literally started crying on the phone with the Chinese cable lady. Not blubbering so that she knew but a few tears came down because I thought, "I can't do this! I'm never going to get cable or internet or a fax line because I can't UNDERSTAND THESE PEOPLE!"

Finally my cousin said I could enlist the help of the IT guy in Tokyo. He's from India. So he gets on the phone with her and he said, "You weren't kidding. I could barely understand her." That made me feel better.

My apartment is coming together slowly but surely. I'm having a hard time finding a store that sells hair dryers. I run into random road blocks like that. Finally found a place today that sells Toaster Ovens. So now I can toast my bagels and maybe actually cook something.

Oh - here's another gem. In my kitchen I have a 2-top electric stove. There are only 3 buttons for each burner. Should be easy enough to figure out. I'm good with electronic stuff.

Oh no.

I hit every combination possible on that damn thing and it would start to heat and then stop. I just wanted my fucking scrambled eggs. It was 5am as my body clock was still off and I just wanted my EGGS!

So my super for the apt., Eddie, comes over to fix some stuff in the apartment. [sidebar: he was supposed to have the apt. cleaned and have everything fixed by the time I arrived but when I got here - no such luck. The toilet seat had urine all over it, the toilet paper roll was broken, there was a nasty used towel in the bathroom, a ladder in my shower, a huge dead cockroach in my closet, 1/2 the lights didn't work, etc.] I ask him to show me how to use the stovetop and he puts a kettle on there and it works right away. I'm like, "What the fuck? I did the same thing with my frying pan."

I've finally figured it out. It senses the size of the pot/pan when you put it on there and if it's not EXACTLY the right size it shuts itself off. Only my kettle and one pot work. I bought a frying pan for eggs, etc. at IKEA but that doesn't work. And I swear the circumference of that pan is about 2cm different than the kettle. Fucking annoying. So I'm cooking everything in one pot that has no teflon so everything sticks like hell to it.

Then I had Eddie show me how to operate the A/C because the remote control for it is in Chinese. I just kept hitting buttons and had no idea what I was doing. I couldn't shut it off and was freezing my ass off. Haha...

Ahhhh, life abroad. It's all good. At least everyone is super nice here and super patient with me as I get frustrated easily. But that's mostly when I'm stressed. I've calmed down the past couple of days. After my boxes arrived I felt better. Tomorrow my desk/chair/filing cabinet are being delivered and my internet/fax line will be installed. So soon I will finally have a work space and will feel like I can really work at 100%.

The weather is GREAT here. It's not as humid anymore. SO excited about that.

I just joined a gym today. Called Pure Fitness. I desperately needed a workout and feel much better now. It's a really sweet gym. They provide everything. Towels, workout clothes, water bottles, etc. They have tons of DVD's to choose from and you can watch them when you're on the cardio machines. So today I watched a couple episodes of "Weeds". It's mostly expats that go there.

My Aunt Diana and Aunt Cindi are coming here this Friday. So excited. They're really fun. Diana is my cousin Randy's mom. Then next Friday I take off for Vietnam for a week. Am flying to Hanoi...am there for a couple days...then I'm doing an overnight junk cruise in Halong Bay (picture below)
















Then I'm flying to Danang and staying at a resort in Hoi An (picture of my room below)



It's a shame I have this room all to myself. I'm going to do that place up. Relax, massage, shop. Going to be fabulous! I'm getting a huge moving allowance from the company that I wasn't expecting and I just found out that they're paying for 3 business class flights home each year so that's new money I didn't know about. [Sarah, if you're reading this don't worry...I'm being good and am going to pay off my credit cards in no time!]

This is a long ass blog entry so I'll stop here.